Reflections on "Dealing with Family" Judges 10: 6-18; 11: 1-11

I enjoyed preaching this sermon.  In fact, despite the challenge of connecting the stories in Judges to our current context, I have enjoyed reading and telling these stories.  

The sermon title suggested the sermon would be about family, but it turned out that the family conflict was just a lens for looking at the relationship between God and humans.  

The Dr. Phil illustration seemed to work pretty well.  

One of the challenges in preaching this text is that that the family conflict was extreme.  Most of us know about family conflict, but not at the level of actually banishing a family member.  Likewise, most of the us sin against God, but I suspect most of us don't see ourselves as having totally turned away from God like the Israelites.  The dilemma -- do I try and convince the listener that we are as bad as the Israelites, or do I find some other way to connect with the story.

The sermon lands on grace, which I think is supported by the text.  But, I probably should have also noted the punishment (i.e. defeat from their enemy) that the Israelites suffered.  How do we proclaim grace without it becoming "cheap grace" (to us Bonhoeffer's term)?

“Dealing with Family” October 28, 2012; Judges 10: 6-18; 11: 1-11; Fall 2012 Judges series; FPC, Troy

Introduction: One of the reasons we find Judges so fascinating is that the stories take place in the messy, complicated stories of our humanity.

This week as we begin the story of Jephthah, we encounter a story of family problems.

Move 1: Dealing with family

a. No surprise that we read a biblical story about family problems.

1. Early in Genesis, near the beginning of humanity, we have the conflict between brothers Cain and Abel. Cain gets angry and jealous because the Lord prefers Abel's offering, so he kills his brother.

2. Fast forward to Jacob and Esau. Jacob steals his brother Esau's birthright. And to make it even more intriguing, his mother chooses sides and helps Jacob trick his brother.
3. Fast forward to Joseph – his brothers almost kill him because of their jealousy (and probably because of Joseph's annoying attitude), and eventually settle for selling him into slavery.

b. now we have the story of Jephthah.

1. Jephthah is the Gilead's son, but his mother was a prostitute.
2. Jephthah was the illegitimate brother.
3. In that time, it would not have been uncommon for brothers to have different mothers and still be treated the same, but it also creates an opportunity for exploitation and fighting, particularly when it relates to who will inherit the property, or money, or their father's power.
4. We remember that after King David's death, his sons from different mothers battle it out to see who will take over the kingdom.
5. They may have had a different understanding of family with fathers having multiple wives, but it still led to complications.

100. In Jephthah's case, the brothers act out against him.

1. Since his mother was a prostitute, they decide he should have not standing among them.

2. In fact, they decided that he literally should not stand among them.

3. They banish him.

4. They send him away.

5. He will not get any part of their inheritance.

6. He goes off to live on his own.

6. he becomes an outlaw.

7. And a mighty warrior.

500. Then Israel gets in trouble.

1. the Ammonites make war against them.

2. They look among themselves and find no one who can lead them into battle.

3. They need a warrior and none is to be found.

4. But someone remembers Gilead: the illegitimate brother, the one who has been sent away, the one who lives among outlaws, and the one who is a mighty warrior.

e. They approach Jephthah ans ask him to come back and lead them into battle.

1. he rebukes them.
2. “Aren't you the ones who sent me away? I thought I wasn't good enough to be part of the family? But now that you need me, I'm good enough? Really?”
3. Really.
4. “well, if I come back and save you, I get to be the head of the family.”
5. “It's a deal.”

f. Family love at its best.

1. Not quite “Leave It to Beaver” or “the Waltons.”
2. Not even “Modern Family.”
3. More like the Dr. Phil show when Dr. Phil interviews estranged family members.
4. Can you visualize the episode that might take place if Dr. Phil has Jephthah and his brothers telling their stories?
5. Dr. Phil: “And why did you send your brother away? Were you feeling threatened?”

“Uh , no. We just wanted to build the relationships between our legitimate family members. WE didn't mean to hurt Jephthah's feelings.”

Dr. Phil: “Jephthah, what did it feel like to be banished?”

Jephthah: “Total rejection. My own family turned against me. It led me to a destructive way of life.”

Dr. Phil: Jephthah, why did you agree to help out your brothers?”

“Well, they really needed me. I couldn't say no in their time of crisis. WE are family, after all.”

And then they would hug and express their familial ties.

Being a family can be complicated.

Move 2: the story of God's story with Israel runs parallel to this story of Jephthah and his family.

a. it begins with, surprise, Israel turning away from God again.

1. It's as if the world is too tempting for the Israelites.

2. They look around at the myriad of foreign gods, and want them.

3.There is a theory that God was too boring for the Israelites. They wanted to chase the foreign gods that demands sacrifices, that seemingly had a different god for each person's desire. All the Lord could offer was love and grace, two gifts that were hard to quantify and see in material ways.

4. Whatever the reason, the Israelites went chasing the other gods, leaving the Lord behind.

b. Until, of course, things got bad again.

1. Then, the Israelites call on God to save them.

2. Last week, we saw God's reticence to rescue the Israelites as we read Gideon's story.

3. Now God is even more angry.
4. God reminds them of the times that God has saved them previously.

5. And God notes that Israel has repeatedly turned away despite being saved by God.

6. God delivers the strongest rebuke yet and refuses to accept Israel's words of repentance.

c. What does Israel do?

1. They put away their foreign gods and worship the Lord.

2. It feels a little bit like the child who has gotten into trouble but still wants to go out to the football game on Friday night. She becomes busy as a bee – doing the dishes; vacuuming the family room; putting up the laundry – see I've changed. I”m not that person you grounded.

3. we who read the story knows Israel's repentance won't last.

4. Surely God knows that Israel's repentance will not last.

5. But , in the midst of Israel's suffering and shallow attempt at repentance, we are told that "God "could no longer bear to to see Israel suffer" (Judges 10:16).

d. Imagine again a Dr. Phil show, except this time God and the Israelite leaders are being interviewed about betrayal and forgiveness.

Dr. Phil: “So why did you turn away from God again.”

“we just can't help ourselves. It's not who we want to be. It's not how we want to act. But somehow we failed again.

Dr. Phil: “God, what do you have to say?”

“Once again. Once again.”

“but this time will be different. I know it's hard to believe. But this time we've learned our lesson.”

“once again. Once again.”

Dr. Phil: Okay, God. You don't sound very convinced. So why in the world would you even consider helping Israel out again?”

“Because I cannot bear to watch my people suffer.”

Dr. Phil: “but aren't you just giving in and teaching them bad habits?”

“I cannot bear to watch my people suffer

conclusion: "During a British conference on comparative religions, experts from around the world debated what, if any, belief was unique to the Christian faith. They began eliminating possibilities. Incarnation? Other religions had different versions of gods appearing in human form. Resurrection? Again, other religions had accounts of return from death. The debate went on for some time until C.S. Lewis wandered into the room. 'What's the rumpus about?' he asked, and heard in reply that his colleagues were discussing Christianity's unique contribution among world religions. Lewis responded, "Oh, that's easy. It's grace." (Philip Yancey in "What's So Amazing About Grace?")c

Judges continues to be a complicated book about our relationship with God and God's desire to save us, despite ourselves.

And in those complications, grace abounds.